December 2017

21

Dec'17

Holiday Wishes

Ginger Lapid-Bogda PhD, the author of six best-selling Enneagram-business books, is a speaker, consultant, trainer, and coach. She provides certification programs for professionals around the world who want to bring the Enneagram into organizations with high-impact business applications, and is past-president of the International Enneagram Association. Visit her website: TheEnneagramInBusiness.com. ginger@theenneagraminbusiness.com

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20

Dec'17

3 Centers of Intelligence | their many uses – Part 4

The 3 Centers of Intelligence – Head Center, Heart Center and Body Center – form a basis of the 20th century mystic, philosopher and teacher, G. I. Gurdjieff, brought to the Fourth Way teachings and to the Enneagram. This blog describes one way among many ways that Centers of Intelligence can be useful and practical in developing relationships. Christopher L Heuertz in his recent book, “The Sacred Enneagram,” has a section on contemplative practices for the 3 Enneagram types within each Center of Intelligence. Intuitively, what Heuertz suggests makes sense. Practically (and amusingly), Heuertz has selected that which is the most difficult for individuals from that Center. Torture, in a spiritual sense, may be another name for this. Doing what is most difficult for us can be the most highly transformative. Body Center Types: Being in Stillness The Body Center of Intelligence is also known as the Action Center. It is the place where movement and delivery occur, where 8s move to action big and fast when they feel vulnerable, anxious, excited or just don’t know what else to do. 9s also like action, but they also like inaction. However, they want to be the ones to choose: action, no action, some action. 1s are very active and seem to be continuously busy doing something. Imagine all three types being in total stillness, or as still as they can be and for over periods of time: minutes, hours, days, weeks. Being in Stillness | Being in stillness for any period of time can be difficult for everyone, no matter what their Enneagram type. To be still begins and ends in the body; the best way to practice this is through the body through somatic awareness. Instead of thinking “Be still, be still,” give yourself something to engage your stillness. Trying to be still is more than likely going to want to make you move instead of be still. One somatic practice is to put your attention to any part of your body you want, and then keep your attention there without forcing it. Then let your attention spread to adjacent areas of your body. Notice your somatic experience and allow your somatic attention to keep spreading. If you want, set a timer, starting at 5 minutes. Each day increase the time period to two-five minutes longer. Heart Center Types: Being in Solitude The three Heart Center Types, 2, 3 and 4, are rarely alone. If they are alone, they might be texting, emailing, talking on the phone, or even just thinking about people. None of this is being alone in solitude. Without other people as a frame of reference, 2s, 3s, and 4s may not have a solid grasp on who they are. Being in Solitude | Being in solitude is simply being with yourself and not in any contact whatsoever with other people and doing so consciously and for an increasingly extended period time. Head Center Types: Being in Silence While we all have a lot of chatter going on in our heads, it is most obvious in the Head Center types 5, 6, and 7. 5s are thinking about information and strategies, often strategies to maintain their energy form being depleted. 6s are thinking about problems to solve, the different paths that can be taken, risk assessments, and general or specific worries. 7s are thinking about exciting ideas, new plans and possibilities, and innovative approaches. Being in Silence | Being in silence is about internal silence by stopping the incessant inner chatter. Usually this involves observing the chatter, slowing down the chatter, and then emptying the mind so there is silence. Silence doesn’t happen immediately; it is a process. What helps is to be alone so the chatter is easier to notice combined with not doing activities that stimulate the inner conversation. Ginger Lapid-Bogda PhD, the author of six best-selling Enneagram-business books, is a speaker, consultant, trainer, and coach. She provides certification programs for professionals around the world who want to bring the Enneagram into organizations with high-impact business applications, and is past-president of the International Enneagram Association. Visit her website: TheEnneagramInBusiness.com. ginger@theenneagraminbusiness.com

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13

Dec'17

3 Centers of Intelligence | their many uses – Part 3

The 3 Centers of Intelligence – Head Center, Heart Center and Body Center – form a basis of the 20th century mystic, philosopher and teacher, G. I. Gurdjieff, brought to the Fourth Way teachings and to the Enneagram. This blog describes one way among many ways that Centers of Intelligence can be useful and practical in developing relationships. In our program “Relationships Reimagined,” Peter O’Hanrahan and I do a compelling exercise in which people from each Center of Intelligence discuss the importance of each of the areas shown above that come from their specific Center. These are the areas about which the types from each Center are the most sensitive. Of course, all three areas matter in all great relationships. It’s just that the Center-based area is most crucial to people from that Center. Body Center Types: Truthfulness Body Types 8, 9, and 1 have a built-in truth-detector that they experience, at first, somatically and then their minds and hearts fill in the missing pieces of data. In addition, this happens very quickly for these three types and once their detector goes off, it becomes difficult for them to experience the other person in a more open way. Truthfulness, for these three types, makes or breaks a real relationship. Why being truthful matters in relationships for all Enneagram types | Being truthful in relationships allows us to honor our own voice and that of the other person as building blocks to intimacy; dishonest relationships generate distance and separation. Heart Center Types: Respect The three Heart Center Types, 2, 3 and 4, are all keenly sensitive to being treated with respect. Respect isn’t only the words used, although words do matter. Respect is about nonverbal behavior, timing, voice tone, and more. When Heart Center types do not feel respected, they shut down from engagement with the other person. When this happens, repairing the relationship can be challenging unless an honest dialogue occurs and the issue gets resolved. Why respect matters in relationships for all Enneagram types | Respecting yourself and feeling respected by the other person allows each of you to be yourself and to interact as equals; without respect, defenses rise, tension abounds, and anger emerges. Head Center Types: Trust With the emotion of fear as a cornerstone to 5s, 6s and 7s, and trust is a close cousin of fear. If we do not fear someone, we are more likely to trust them. The more we trust someone, the less likely we are to fear that person. Although different fear factors may set off the “I don’t trust you” mechanism in the three different Head Center types at another level, fear is fear and trust is trust. And without trust, there cannot be a meaningful relationship. Why trust matters in relationships for all Enneagram types | Without trust, there is limited depth and an abundance of wariness; with trust, relationships deepen and thrive Ginger Lapid-Bogda PhD, the author of six best-selling Enneagram-business books, is a speaker, consultant, trainer, and coach. She provides certification programs for professionals around the world who want to bring the Enneagram into organizations with high-impact business applications, and is past-president of the International Enneagram Association. Visit her website: TheEnneagramInBusiness.com. ginger@theenneagraminbusiness.com

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06

Dec'17

Development | decision making

Life is the sum of all your choices. ~ Albert Camus The Enneagram – and in particular, the Three Centers of Intelligence – can help us become wiser and more conscious decision makers in all aspects of our personal and professional lives. How we can do this is based on the idea that if we have open access to each Center and can use each Center of Intelligence – the Head, Heart and Body – in productive and integrated ways, our decision making becomes more powerful and effective. Here are the ways: HEAD CENTER | objective analysis Ones | Be careful not to let your positive or negative opinions about another person overshadow the objective data; don’t overthink your decisions. Twos | Do not let your personal feelings for other people bias your decisions; strive to be objective. Threes | Consider data, including feelings, that you may not have considered but that can help you make the best decision. Fours | Don’t let your personal experiences and feelings bias your view of the facts; become more objective in your decision making. Fives | Remember that logical analysis is not necessarily objective; logic can have its own bias, depending on the logic used. Sixes | Slow down your analysis of the data related to a decision, particularly when you are anxious or notice that you are repeating the same thoughts. Sevens | Make sure you really have all the data, not just the highlights. Eights | Question your assumptions; ask the opinions of others; take in multiple viewpoints when making decisions. Nines | Remember that you can collect too much data and then overanalyze a situation; this creates confusion about which information is the most relevant. HEART CENTER | increased empathy Ones | Consider both your own and other people’s feelings in depth. Twos | Examine your motivation for needing to know exactly what others are thinking and feeling. Threes | Spend time considering your own feelings and those of others; factor them into your decisions. Fours | Examine your perceptions about what other people are feeling regarding issues and decisions; make sure you are not projecting your own emotional reactions onto others. Fives | Learn to feel your own feelings in real time, not after the fact. This will enable you to read other people’s feelings more accurately and to use this information in decision making. Sixes | Remain empathic even when someone’s behavior bothers, hurts, or angers you. Sevens | Examine your feelings and read your internal cues; this will help you to read others’ body language. Eights | Take the time to sense the feelings of other people, even when you don’t respect the individuals. Nines | Make sure to maintain your empathy, even with people you perceive as negative and complaining. BODY CENTER | taking effective action Ones | Turn decision making into an art form; use just enough action to get the results you want. Twos | Learn the art of timing so that you will know when to act, when to wait, and when to do nothing. Threes | Work on making most of your decisions less quickly so that new insights have time to percolate. Fours | Don’t let feelings immobilize you and prevent you from making a decision; action is one way to move through emotional reactions. Fives | Make decisions in a timely manner, using information from your mind, heart, and gut. Sixes | Make decisions that are good risks, not just exciting ones; take action using your gut as a way to bypass overanalysis. Sevens | Slowing your pace will help you make wise decisions, not just decisions that intrigue or stimulate you. Eights | Don’t rush into decisions; don‘t make overly complex decisions when a simple solution would work just as well. Nines | Figure out why you procrastinate; err on the side of taking action too quickly rather than too slowly. Ginger Lapid-Bogda PhD, the author of six best-selling Enneagram-business books, is a speaker, consultant, trainer, and coach. She provides certification programs for professionals around the world who want to bring the Enneagram into organizations with high-impact business applications, and is past-president of the International Enneagram Association. Visit her website: TheEnneagramInBusiness.com. ginger@theenneagraminbusiness.com

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